I have always believed that prior to leading others that we need to learn to lead ourselves in our lives. This means that first we need to do the inner work of knowing whom and what we are in our own lives, prior to taking on the responsibility of leading others.
We need to have done the deep work within of knowing our values, having a code of conduct as to how we live our lives, and a clear understanding of our purpose, mission and vision for our lives. The benefit to this type of work is that it is timeless. By this I mean that there is no “flavour’ of the newest leadership fad. Deep work is deep work, there is no way of getting around it, or “dressing” it up to be sexy or appealing.
It takes time, energy and commitment to look within. There is no quick fix. You can’t get someone else to do the work for you or “contract out, and get back to me with the answer type of situation. The work is not glamorous. It is most often done on our own, though beneficial to work with others in community,
Hard, tiring, a long process of peeling the layers of the onion back to get to the centre of it all. It means self- reflection, asking for feedback, having more questions than answers.. And perhaps most difficult being truthful with ourselves. This very process can be very tricky on its own. To actually have an awareness of the truth for yourself. Not just the intellectual process, but by the experienced process of living it., and knowing your truth by direct experience.
This means making and taking hard choices in life. Stretching yourself out of your comfort zone, or what I call our “stagnant zone”, of decay and atrophy. It means taking the setbacks as opportunities to grow, and learn from the experience, and perhaps most importantly, taking responsibility for our lives and our actions. As soon as we “blame” externals, we miss the opportunity to learn, and we also give away our power to events out of our control.
To know and understand whom you are is difficult, though also very rewarding. To be able to discern the differences and influences of the experiences and circumstances that have shaped us, though are not us, is formidable in its teaching.
This process of leading yourself never ends. As we constantly change and evolve. Ideally we are always growing, and expanding. And with this growth we have moments where we experience the uniqueness and the beauty of whom we are. Imperfections and all.
Then one day we might realize that we are all the proverbial snowflakes and waves - unique. It is this uniqueness that allows us to lead ourselves and others with the knowledge that we all have gifts to share. it is by looking within that we find the clues to what these gifts are for leading ourselves and others in life.