Quote:
“Lost Time is Never Found Again”. Benjamin Franklin
The Action:
At one point in my life, I was managing a windsurfing school in Ontario. It was a wild and remote place with more birds than people. It was an incredible experience, wind, wildness, sand dunes, storms, though not a very busy school. I had lots of free time to windsurf and muse.
I spent five months living in a tent close to the beach, listening to a constant pounding of the surf on the sand, and the screaming of the seagulls. There was an Island just offshore that was a bird sanctuary. I managed to swim out there a couple of times, though the constant dive bombing and screeching always made me wonder why. The adventure I suppose.
It was a strange choice of a place to be trying to start a windsurfing school, not many people, desperate and raw. I enjoyed the solitude and the deep energy of the area. There was also a constant trickle of characters moving through, locals, and nomads, and every day was different and a little surreal.
With time plentiful and my companions predominately birds and a few eclectic characters it gave me a lot of time to reflect. I also had time to engage in intermittent moments of interaction with the nomads wondering through always seeking something. Three nomads eclipse all the others in my mind’s eye. Two brothers and their buddy. He was the pack leader. All three were feral beyond measure and unlike any that I have met since those days. Intense and life changing. I became them.
The three of them drove in one day in the buddy’s seventy-six Chevy van, fully done in shag, stereo and fuzzy dice. A metallic powder light blue if I remember correctly. The three friends were wild men, in every meaning of the word. They lived life way beyond the edge, though always seemed to come back, a little worse for wear, always a touch wiser, and sometimes bloodied. They pulled me into their vortex, and I ran with their wildness for as long as I could take the pace. It was relentless and ruthless in the raw energy of living every moment to the fullest.
After spending a blur of five weeks with them, feeling a lot worse for wear and a tad wiser, I remember sitting around a fire with the three of them one night discussing what a man was meant to be. The older of the two brothers pulled out a tattered piece of paper and on it was written “A Recipe for A Real Man”. He paused for a moment and then began to read, thoughtfully and with a deep familiarity to those words.
1. Physically strong and mentally tough
2. Generous, open hearted and always willing to help a friend
3. Polite and friendly until shown otherwise and then watch out
4. Dream big dreams and go after them ruthlessly
5. Live life on the edge of your capacity and learn from your mistakes
6. Always say thank you and give more then you take
7. Know your boundaries and respect those of others
8. Be an athlete in whatever capacity that is for you, as it takes discipline, and good habits
9. Know your values and your value
10. Laugh often and play hard
11. Be a Master at what ever you do because then you will always have a job
12. Have a solid handshake and don’t break your word, as it is your reputation
13. Build your character through your actions
14. Cultivate presence and a bit of a swagger, because there is only one of you
15. Learn how to dance and be a great kisser, because then you will always get kissed
16. Treat woman with respect and equality
17. Treat animals with kindness
18. Take time for strangers as you never know they might become a friend
19. Have plans for the future though live in the day
20. It’s best not to fight though if you have to, make it quick and fair
21. If your father was a jerk it doesn’t give you the right to be one, change the legacy
22. Do what you love as life is short and precious
23. Surround yourself with people you love and that love you
24. Be a man and not a boy when your moment comes
25. Take more then your fair share of responsibility because it will build substance for who you are to become
I will never forget those three men boys. Wise beyond their years, generous in their hearts and living each moment so ferociously that a tame life never stood a chance. I often wonder where they are now, and how they made out. It makes me smile in my heart.
The Book
Courting the Wild Twin. Martin Shaw
Somewhat in the same genre as Robert Bly and Iron John. Shaw tells the story and the interpretation of two fairy tales and explores the concept of the “wild twin” that lives within each of us. It is the wild twin that is often forgotten as we live lives of responsibility, though because of this we often suffer an inner death.
The book is also a call to action and activism for us and the earth. It is in many ways the death of the wild twin that has led us to the present-day predicament that we are in from an ecological perspective. Shaw presents some solutions from his perspective, and one thought that I deeply resonated with is that we need to “hear” the climate crisis to act, as to merely seeing it with our eyes. 4.5/5